Tuesday, December 30, 2003

Mom and Dad are having another dinner party and they invited a bunch of "music people" and "TV people". They spent hours putting it together and making all these calls and then they left us here in the house alone to go food shopping.

While they were out, the phone rang a lot more than usual, so I went into the den to listen to the answering machine. It was a joke. The people all started canceling like they always do, because they've got better parties to go to, with people who are more important than my parents. They gave bullshit excuses like, "we have a housing inspection tomorrow and we are refinancing," or "I'm on a deadline for CBS, they need it in the morning," and "I hate to do this so last minute, but I have to go to a birthday party."

When they came back, Mom and Dad were pissed. "I'm out of the business," Dad yelled. 'We spent 70 bucks on fish alone!" said Mom.
I don't really love fish, but the kitty does and she's got about 50,000 pounds of the stuff in the fridge right now.

Why couldn't it have been meat? Why? Why? WHY?

We're going to have a much better evening without all these Hollywood phonies in the house anyway. I won't have to try not to bite people who pretend to like me and we can just be all cozy in a pack and eat together with the fire on and watch HardBall.

I love the name HARDBALL. That's a show for me. But they should just throw all kinds of balls around instead of all that political stuff my parents watch all the god damn time. Dad used to be a head writer on Politically Incorrect, which was really booooring. No balls.


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