Saturday, December 16, 2006

Deniers, Jokers and Haters


Mom gets very upset over silly meetings that are happening on the other side of the world and Dad makes jokes about it, which drives her crazy.

Mom: “I can’t believe it! There are French people and David Duke at an absolutely demonic conference in Tehran to deny the holocaust ever existed! They are really pushing it over there.”

Dad: “Well you know, the Shoah must go on…”

Mom: “Stop it! You’re horrible. I’m serious.”

Dad: (singing) “There’s NO business like SHOWAH business!”

Mom: “STOP it!”

Then Dad grabbed Mom in a dancing embrace and dragged her around the kitchen, waltzing.

Dad: “You know what? You could have been a concentration camp hottie, Miss Auschtits!”

Mom: (trying not to laugh) “You’re disgusting, you know that?"

Mom’s kind of right, I know how unfunny death camps are. I was in one, right here in America. Now that I’m out though, I like watching Dad make Mom laugh.

You know, come to think of it, I’m not too thrilled with the humans over there in Koran land myself. Not only do they have international conferences where a bunch of nutjobs get together to deny one of the most horrific tragedies in history, but they turned down really skilled rescue dogs to help them during their terrible earthquake in Bam a few years ago. They think dogs are unclean. I guess we're just too filthy to try to save 40,000 people from the rubble of an earthquake. They must have hairballs for brains.

Mom and Dad were reading the Koran and the ridiculous writings of the Hadith (a really, really long, dog and pig hating book of Islamic laws). They were reading this stuff out loud. I couldn't believe what I was hearing!

Mom: "Listen to this! 'Whoever keeps a dog, one Qirat of the reward of his good deeds is deducted daily, unless the dog is used for guarding a farm or cattle.' Unbelievable."

Dad: " This is is hilarious! 'Prayer is annulled by a dog, a donkey and a woman (if they pass in front of the praying people)." I said, "You have made us (i.e. women) dogs."

Mom: "Too much. They are bonkers. Listen to this one! 'Allah Taãla the Creator of this Universe - having created the dog would surely have known that the dog requires Human affection and love to exist in this world. Rasulullah (Sallallaaahu Álayhi Wasallam) would have advised us to keep dogs as pets. On the contrary, we are instructed not to keep dogs as pets and 'love' them as exemplified by the non-Muslims. Remember our life is structured and bound by the Shariah i.e. The Noble Qurãn and the beautiful example of Rasulullah (Sallallaaahu Álayhi Wasallam). Consider these Ahaadith:
Sayyidna Abu Talha (Radhiyallaahu Ánhu) reports that Rasulullah (Sallallaaahu Álayhi Wasallam) said, "Angels do not enter a house wherein there is a dog or an animate picture. (Sahih Bukhari Hadith no. 2986).'

OK, I get it. They hate dogs. They even hate pictures of dogs. Wow. Dogs don't hate anybody.

As a joke, I’d like to send them an army of pooping kitties. Turn the place into a giant litter box that never gets changed.

Until they change their mind about dogs.

1 Comments:

Blogger Pisser said...

I am frankly not surprised that they consider dogs unclean, or that dogs are equated with women. But what did a donkey ever do to them?

They must have been to see that show in Tijuana.

4:40 PM  

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